Feeling destructive

When I am miserable I always do something I will regret, usually I chose shopping for stuff that I don’t really need, tonight since I am out of cash I chose the lots of calories option lol. One banana milkshake complete with aerosol cream and a galaxy ripple smashed over the top. Very nice it was too lol. I am deeply depressed tonight, I have spent a lot of today crying. I wouldn’t know where to start to talk about it. I just can’t see anyway to make things better, so for now my allies are crying, calories and criticism of myself for being so pathetic!